Saturday, April 29, 2006

i hate this...i hate feeling like this!i hate feeling like im completely alone in this stupid fuckin world, i hate crying myself to sleep at least once a week, i hate all the fighting, i hate feeling like everyone is more important than me especially when its the person i love the most that makes me feel like, i hate feeling like im not good enough for anyone, i hate hurting, i hate having stupid flashbacks of things i cant talk about, im sick of having things hidden from me, im sick of him always getting mad when i dont tell him something even if its because it hurts to talk about but never being able to get mad at him when he hides things from so he "wont hurt me", im sick of being used, im sick of being lied to, im sick of all the yelling, im sick of all stress, im sick of hurting like this and not being able to tell the person whos hurting me the most because i know that they will just get pissed at me...they always get pipssed at me when im hurting!oh well i guess ill get over and try to get used to the pain...i know it will never stop and if i dont expect it it will only hurt worse each time!i guess its true...when u expect some one not hurt you they will because everyone will but when u expect some one not to the pain is worse...pretty much unbearable!~jenn